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Monday, November 07, 2011

Jesus and his Dinosaur

Urban Outfitters is selling a tee that reads "Even though we know dinosaurs survived the flood (on Noah's Ark), we don't know if Jesus ever rode them. But he probably did!"

Since Jesus is, well, Jesus, it's safe to assume he could ride a dinosaur regardless of their status on the endangered species list. Still, imagining the days of Jesus as days with dinosaurs puts a whole knew spin on what the manger scene could look like.

Thursday, November 11, 2010

Sexy!? Jesus

According to this T-Shirt created by TheSporkMan on Zazzle, Jesus has Sexy legs (and only costs $22.95).
According to Lady Gaga He wears red lace with halo of light hairstyles.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

"You Make Jesus Cry" with your slutty underwear

One Horse Shy brings you an essential piece of underwear that tells everyone (yes, show everyone your panties) "You make Jesus cry." According to their website, One Horse Shy hopes this garment will “help spread this message of shame & guilt to all the dirty sinners in the world.”

If shame and guilty aren't your evangelistic style, you can try "Jesus Loves You" or “WTFWJD.”

For those of you men who prefer not to experiment with ladies underpinnings there are boxers available in all these varieties.

Oh yeah, buy American.

Sunday, May 08, 2005

Footprinting Jesus

ShoesoftheFisherman.com sells shoes that have "Jesus" printed backwards are the bottom of the right shoe, and "Loves You" printed backwards on the left shoe. When you walk wearing these shoes, you will leave the message that "Jesus Loves You" where ever you've been. These shoes are available in flip flops, sandals, and snow boots.


Kathleen L. Farrell, founder of Shoes of the Fisherman, was abducted. She was released after she quoted the 23rd Psalm. After this experience, she tried to think of ways to tell people that Jesus loved them. She glued plastic letters to the bottom of her sandals so she would leave the message "Jesus loves you" any where a footprint can be seen.


Shoes of the Fisherman has a three-fold mission statement. The first part is to care for those who are making the shoes. The webiste says "The sandals are made in Thailand in a clean, Christian-owned factory that employs adult Christian workers who are paid a living wage." Second, they seek to provide an outlet for Christians to "wear their faith." Third, they want to see the words "Jesus Loves You" on every beach.

The website features what appears to be a testimony like story. It is not stated to be an actual testimony, but it at least gives and idea of what Shoes of the Fisherman hopes will result from their shoes.

You can order the shoes online. ShoesoftheFisherman.com also offers t-shirts and sunglasses


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"How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!" ~Romans 10:15

Friday, May 06, 2005

Jesus on a Toilet Paper Roll

Do you ever wonder what you should do with all of those empty toilet paper rolls? Someone put good time into making that roll, and it seems such a shame to just throw it away.

Wonder no more. You can redeem your empty toilet paper rolls by turning them into the very image of Jesus himself. The craft is rather simple. First, print out either the color template, or the black and white template. Then glue the pieces onto the toilet paper roll as the instructions describe.

One mother suggests a game that can be played with the paper saviors. It’s called “Jesus is Alive.” This mother would hide the TP Jesus then her sons would search for it. When they found Jesus, they would yell, “Jesus is Alive.” This project provides hours of resurrecting fun, and it’s a great way to recycle.


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Wednesday, May 04, 2005

Jesus O' Lantern

ChristianCrafters.com showcases a craft created by Emmalea Butler to create Jesus O' Lantern. This Christian twist on the traditional Jack O' Lantern, is created by drawing a copy of a negative picture of Jesus' "face" onto a pumpkin. You then "deeply scrape" off all the black areas of the drawing creating a deep impression on the flesh of the pumpkin. You then put a light inside and the "face" of Jesus glows through. The intructions included a step by step manual and a downloadable copy of the negative.

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Huggy Jesus

He's "soft and cuddly." He's "hypoallergenic." He's even "machine washable." And somehow, even though he's the only doll this company makes, he's "collectable." He is "Huggy Jesus". "Huggy Jesus" is a plush doll wearing an orange tunic and a blue coat. His arms are open and ready to give you a hug.


"Huggy Jesus" is more than an attempt to make money. He has a story. The doll's creator, Sean Pinkerton, had reached the bottom. He had no hope left in his life. While out in the rain one night with no where to go, Pinkerton stumbled upon a church. He hadn't prayed before, but he prayed for all the things he needed: food, shelter, help. While praying Pinkerton saw Jesus standing there with open arms. Pinkerton was moved to tears and ran into those arms to give Jesus a hug, With "Huggy Jesus", Pinkerton hopes everyone can experience the hug of Jesus.


The doll is available from HuggyJesus.com. Although, there is no online store at this time, you can purchase the doll by phone for $19.95. Not a high price to pay for the hug of a Savior.

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Monday, May 02, 2005

Ultrachrist: Get Ready for a Whole New Christ

In the movie "Ultrachrist" by Leisure Suit Media, Jesus Christ returns to the modern-day streets of New York City. Upon realizing he's completely out of touch with a reality, Christ seeks to learn the new culture and minister in a new way--a superhero kind of way. Ultrachrist, complete with Spandex outfit, cape and theme song, fights sin where he sees it. His father does not approve and wishes Christ would minister like he did back in the old days.


Christ picks up a couple of new friends in NYC. His soon-to-become-more-than-a-friend Molly helps him adjust to modern life and make the transformation into Ultrachrist. She also helps him find an apartment with two lesbians whose life style he approves. The trailer shows just how out of touch Jesus really is. He is also appalled to find many things out and even says, "The crucifix is the symbol of Christianity? I hated the crucifix. Ouch!"


During the course of the film, Christ battles the Antichrist who is disguised as the Park's Commissioner. He confronts a crotch-grabbing dominatrix. He even sings and dances; one song being the Pro-sex Savior song. "Ultrachrist" is availiable on DVD.


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Jesus of the Week

JesusoftheWeek.com is a website that collects and showcases different representations of Jesus. "Disciples" (anyone who visits or submits to the site) submit different Jesus depictions for the site to feature. Every week a new "Jesus" appears on the home page, and a new "Jesus of the Moment" appears in the sidebar every time you refresh the page.

Among the sites features are Doormat Jesus which is a picture of Jesus on a doormat so you can whip your feet on him when you enter or exit the house. Christy the Snowman is a snowman version of the nativity scene.

Many of the featured representations of Jesus are actually meant to be serious images of Christ. This site however, finds the absurdities in each or mocks the image to no end.

The Testimonial section of the page shows email from various point of one. A few are condemning remarks like "you are sick and promoting filth on the Internet." but one is from a pastor who says, "Your Web site rocks! I'm a pastor and I occasionally slip in Jesus images to my sermon. The congregation definitely loves it. Keep up the good work! Any plans for a book?"

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